Bouncing back

I recently bought a pillow.  It turns out that normal pillows are very bad for me, and I need something a bit different; so now I have a memory foam pillow.  Memory foam is funny stuff.  The pillow came screwed up into a tiny box, and when it was taken out looked frankly pathetic.  Far too thin to be a useful pillow; no discernible shape to it.  The instruction was to leave it for up to 72 hours before use, to allow it to regain its shape.  With no previous experience of memory foam, I was a bit sceptical, and wondered if I'd been scammed.  But lo and behold, a couple of days later the pillow looked just as it was meant to, and I have slept better and had less neck pain ever since.

So, in case you've not already worked out where this parable is going, and perhaps think I'm just telling you an anecdote about a pillow for no reason, let's assume that being in lockdown has been a bit like being shoved into a small box for quite a long time.  We are all naturally bigger than this, but we've compressed, shrunk down, adapted to a more confined way of life.  And now we're being gradually let out of the box, and there is some pressure to bounce back, to get back to normal as much as possible, to get everything restarted.

But for some of us - certainly for me - we still feel flat, thin, unshaped.  It's going to take some time to decompress.  It is, hopefully, possible to recover our former shape, but we're not there yet.

Sleeping on the pillow before it was properly decompressed, according to the instruction booklet (and I have to say, I've never had a pillow that came with instructions before!), would have resulted in it never recovering its right shape.  My pillow would have been flat and useless forever because I was impatient.

You see where this is going.

We need to take this slowly and allow ourselves (and others) the time needed to grow back into shape.  We need to recognise this will happen more slowly for some than others.  Patience will be needed all round.  We should probably also take the time to just check ourselves for damage - maybe we're not just going to recover naturally, even over a long time, but have taken spiritual, emotional, even physical hurt during this period which will need attention.  (I think at this point the pillow analogy has broken down, as all good analogies must at some point).

Anyway, take it easy.  You are more valuable than many pillows.

Resting and Running

Here is a normal Christian narrative about legalism: if you're relying on your own works to establish your righteousness, you'll be continually aware of your shortcomings, always anxious about whether you've done enough.  You'll have to work harder and harder to make sure that you're okay, without ever knowing for sure if you've made it or not.  But then, when you become a Christian and realise that the gospel offers you a righteousness that is not dependent on your own efforts, you'll find rest.  You won't have to be constantly striving.  You can just receive God's gift.

There is a lot of truth in this narrative.

But preaching from Philippians 3 over the last couple of weeks, I notice this isn't the story Paul tells.  Back when Paul was relying on a righteousness of his own, from the law, he seems to have been happy and confident.  "Blameless" is his own verdict on himself in that era.  Pre-conversion Paul was undoubtedly a busy guy - church ain't gonna persecute itself - but he doesn't seem to have been driven by anxiety about his status.  He was secure and apparently at peace.

It is actually post-conversion Paul who describes himself as not having obtained, as not being complete, as straining forward, making every effort to take hold, pressing on like an athlete in a race.  I don't think there is anxiety here, either, but there certainly is effort, running, striving and straining.  There has to be, for Paul.  He now knows that what matters is only Jesus.  Being performatively righteous is no longer the big concern.  Being in and with Jesus - that is the thing.  And Paul is very aware that he does not yet know Jesus as he wants to know him, that he is not with Jesus (and indeed, it would be far better from his perspective to die in order to get to him).

I imagine different people have different stories, pre-conversion.  Relying on the flesh, on your own efforts, could make you confident, or it could make you anxious, depending perhaps on how high you set your standards and how close you came to meeting them.  But post-conversion, the story is always Christ Jesus, the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus our Lord.  And whilst that certainly means resting from both anxiety and boasting, it also means running.  Running like someone who wants the prize.

Running like Jesus is waiting for us on the finishing line.

Righteousness, received and lived

I preached from the first half of Philippians 3 on Sunday, with its absolutely glorious statement of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus our Lord.  Compared to that value, compared to the greatness of knowing Christ, everything else is rubbish.  Whatever we might have placed our confidence in, whatever we might have seen as our identity and security - all rubbish.  Even the good stuff is junk, by comparison to Jesus.

In Philippians the apostle Paul is making this argument against those who are advocating circumcision for Gentile Christians.  They don't seem to have been a present threat in Philippi, but since they seem to have turned up in all Paul's churches after a while it is not surprising that he warns the Philippian Christians to be on their guard.  Specifically, they are to be on their guard by rejoicing in the Lord.  By remembering that they worship by the Spirit and that they are able to boast in Jesus Christ, the Christians will be able to rebuff any temptations to put confidence in the flesh - that is to say, they will not be tempted to rest their identity, their security, their righteousness, in anything merely human, but will look solely to Christ and the huge privilege of knowing him.

Of course the folks advocating circumcision would probably not have seen themselves the way Paul saw them.  They almost certainly didn't think that they were seeking to put their confidence in the flesh!  They surely maintained, at least in their teaching, that righteousness was received by faith in Christ and not otherwise; had they not done so, it is hardly likely that they would have won a hearing amongst Paul's converts.  So what were they saying?  Here's my best guess at a reconstruction.

I think the circumcision guys would have agreed that righteousness - understood to mean a righteous status before God - was received by faith, on the basis of the work of Christ and particularly his death and resurrection.  But then there arises another question - how does that received righteousness translate into a pattern of life?  For the circumcision guys, the answer is circumcision - and presumably observance of other aspects of the Mosaic Law.  Righteous status received by faith translates into a righteous walk shaped by law.

And that is not absurd.  Couldn't they have pointed to the Old Testament for examples of this sort of shape?  Israel was rescued from Egypt - they received liberation.  But then they went to Sinai - the Law told them what a liberated life looked like.  You can - and from an OT perspective, you should - keep both these moments in mind, receiving liberty from God alone, and yet diligently seeking to live out that liberty via the Law.  So what's wrong with it?

You won't get the full story from Philippians 3 - you'd have to go to Galatians to see why that the unfolding of salvation history has made this understanding obsolete.  But in Phil 3 we get one aspect of it: Paul doesn't think they can do what they are doing.  In point of fact, those who require circumcision for 'lived out righteousness' will end up placing their confidence for 'received righteousness' in fleshly things.  Paul sees that underneath their apparent zeal to see a righteous behaviour (lived out) that corresponds to a righteous status (received), there is the desire to possess righteousness, for it to be something that belongs to me.  Paul does not have a righteousness of his own; it is all Christ's - whether righteousness received or righteousness lived out, all is Christ.  That is why conformity to the cross and suffering of Christ is so important for Paul.  Lived out righteousness does not look like achievement or possession; it looks, in fact, like shame and poverty.  It looks like that because this is the way of Jesus.  Righteous living is following in his footsteps.

But the circumcision party want something that belongs to them, a righteousness of their very own.  What could imply possession more fully than carving righteousness into your own body?  But having done so, how could you avoid placing confidence in the flesh - see righteous status as dependent on that fleshly work?  And that would mean losing Christ.

No, far better to admit that we will never possess righteousness, to ditch as junk every possible source of confidence, and to have only Jesus.